"Serving God's Word On Saving Your Marriage"

If you need assistance - please CLICK HERE to send an email.

"And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please Him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light." (Colossians 1:10-12)

All destructive, judgmental, unkind words, thoughts, or actions are like an arsenal of stones, with the power to rob life and virtue. They are tools the enemy wishes to be used by the brethren against each other. Do not fall prey to the Adam syndrome of faultfinding and blame in the failings of others. You do not contend with flesh and blood but with the enemy of your soul (Ephesians 3:12). Understand this and you will be free from the tendency to take part in the casting of stones all the while forgetting your own weaknesses. If I, who am without sin, am not willing to cast stones, why would you? (John 8:7)

Stony words release judgments, bringing about the law of sowing and reaping in your own life in a negative way (Galatians 6:7). You are judged in the way you judge. Forgiveness and humility prevents judgment. Awareness of the log in your own eye makes way for mercy and grace. Jesus is in your midst today to apply the oils of healing to your heart where you have been hurt and judged. In doing this for you He enable you to do it for others. Let Jesus put salve on your eyes that you may see.

The time has come to empty your pouch, your arsenal of all stony words collected over the years. These words consist of all thoughts you have had about certain people in your life that have birthed words which to not release life. God want you to look back and think on those you have relegated to a certain behavior and deemed them unchangeable. All things are possible with God. Be the best advocate against the enemy you can be. Join with God on your behalf and see God move valiantly on your behalf along with others in your life; especially your wife.

The Law Of God:

It is God's law that whatever you sow you will reap. If you sow disharmony in your marriage so will you reap disharmony. If you sow disrespect towards your wife so will you reap disrespect. Whatever you sow in your marriage it will come back to you in harvest. Make no mistake of it; God says so and it will be done.

"While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease" (Genesis 8:22). This verse tells us that there will always be a time of sowing seed and a time of harvest. It is never too late to start sowing seed. However, you may have to reap what you have sowed in the past before you can reap a new harvest.

"They that sow in tears shall reap in joy. He that goeth forth and weepeth, bearing precious seed, shall doubtless come again with rejoicing, bringing his sheaves with him" (Psalm 126:5-6). When you sow seed, you must be willing to give up the seed. The farmer's seed is valuable, but he must give it up by planting it in the ground. The harvest will in time come that will bring us joy!

"In the morning sow thy seed, and in the evening withhold not thine hand: for thou knowest not whether shall prosper, either this or that, or whether they both shall be alike good." (Ecclesiastes 11:6). There is no question of both failing. However, both may produce fruit.

"Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap if we faint not" (Galatians 6:7, 9). Sowing seed will always produce fruit. God has established the law of sowing and reaping. Therefore, you should seek to sow good seed that you may harvest good fruit.


First of all, you are to sow God's love. I often hear men say, "I don't love her anymore." However, you must understand that God's love comes from God; and not yourself. God will give you the seed to sow. "And God is able to make all grace abound toward you; that ye, always having sufficiency in all things, may abound in every good work" (II Corinthians 9:8). You just must be willing to sow God's love.

What is God's love? "Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vauntedth not itself, is not puffed up, Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things" (I Corinthians 13:4-7).

It is interesting that we find seed inside of fruit. Therefore, you are to bear the fruit of the Spirit and in doing so plant the seed in that fruit. "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsufering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law" (Galatians 5:22:23).


First, you are to sow words. (1) You are to use words of praise. When was the last time you praised your wife? (See Proverbs 31:28). Praise is not flattery, but showing true adoration. (2) You are to use words to pray. If your wife is having a difficulty, she may come to you and ask, "Are you still praying for me?" (3) You are to use written words. These are affectionate love notes. The wife may put a love note in you lunch. You may put a love note on her pillow. When was the last time you wrote your wife a good love letter? (4) You are to use words of counsel. This is not a list of demands, but wise advise allowing your wife to make the decision for herself. (5) You should use words of encouragement. For example, you may say, "With God's help, you are going to get through this situation."

Second, you are to sow actions. (1) There is to be financial support. The husband is to care for his wife financially. Finances are tied to security for the wife. She, in turn, is to be a helpmate financially. The virtuous wife of Proverbs 31, was a business woman. She cared for her family, but was also known in the market place. (2) You should sow seed by physical affection. Tender touching is very important. There should be a time of holding hands, of embracing, and of kissing (either a peck on the cheek or a long passionate kiss). This does not, nor should not always led to the bed room. (3) The husband should do his "honey-do-list". You should plan to do things to please your wife. This would include home and auto repairs about which your wife may feel insecure.

Third, you may sow the seed of time. You need to plan quality time with your wife. (1) You should plan to go on dates together (both with and without the kids). The date does not necessarily have to be elaborate. You may just go get a sandwich together or a drive out into the country. You may go window shopping together. (2) The key here is to plan time together. (3) You should plan specific activities together. You can even plan on several "day" outings with the kids to near by lakes, zoos, and parks. You can start going on walks together and get reacquainted with a fresh new love for one another. Your wife will value the memories of the time together; and so will you.... You are also to sow spiritual time. (1) Have a time of daily devotionals together. (2) Spend time in prayer together. (3) Spend time sharing truths of the Word together. One may chase a thousand, but two can put ten thousand to flight (Deuteronomy 33:30). There is a multiplication in spiritual strength. "Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labor" (Ecclesiastes 4:9).

Fourth, you are to sow the proper attitudes. (1) You, the husband, especially, is to be gentle with your wife. You should treat her tenderly. (2) You should also demonstrate courage. Your wife will often mirror your attitudes back to you. (3) If you are supportive; your will be supportive even when you make the wrong decision. (4) You are to have a forgiving attitude towards your wife. (5) You are also to have a peaceful attitude. (6) You are to have a patient attitude. (7) You are to have a loving attitude.

Fifth, you are to sow gifts of blessings. When was the last time that you gave your wife a gift that she did not ask for? It is God-like to give. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life" (John 3:16). Again, Jesus gave us the principle of sowing. "Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure, pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall men give into your bosom. For with the same measure that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again" (Luke 6:38). Gifts are great way to communicate LOVE to your wife. Even when your wife is angry, sometimes a gift will help smooth things over. "A gift in secret pacifieth anger: and a reward in the bosom strong wrath" (Proverbs 21:14). What gift would really bless your wife?

You should also recognize that different people respond differently to the various seed that is planted in their lives. One may respond more positively to gifts of blessings while another may respond more to quality time together. Remember also in the natural it takes time for seed to germinate, sprout, and grow before one see the harvest.

You must understand that God is responsible for the harvest. We can't make the harvest happen. That is God's responsibility. "When a man's ways please the LORD, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him" (Proverbs 16:7). "Now he that ministereth seed to the sower both minister bread for your food, and multiply your seed sown, and increase the fruits of our righteousness" (II Corinthians 9:10). Don't wait! Begin to sow good seed today. The sooner you begin, the sooner your harvest. Amen! "But this I say, He which soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly: and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully" (II Corinthians 9:6).

Finally, you are to understand that it is God that builds the house. You can not do that which only God can do. He is the one who establishes security, love, and peace in a home. "Except the LORD build the house, they labor in vain that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but in vain" (Psalm 127:1).

God's Love From Genesis Through The Revelation.

The enemy uses every opportunity he can. He roars like a lion to intimidate you and will turn everything into an open door if allowed. Make no room for him. Close every door. Confess every sin and break agreement with every impure and unprofitable word spoken by you or over you.

you must remember the enemy will use any opportunity he can to rob your future and your hope (John 10:10). He doesn't know the future, yet he senses upcoming victories I have planned for your life. He senses and knows you have an incredible destiny. He has heard the words of your mouth declaring the things of purpose contained in your heart. What he didn't know before you spoke he knows now; therefore it is time for a little house cleaning - a little housekeeping. It is time to put off any aspect of the old man (Ephesians 4:22)

Copyright © 2008 The Dove Alliance. All rights reserved.